Who Cut the Cheese?: Who Honestly Needs a Snuggie?

Last night, one of my girlfriends invited me over for dinner, in her home that she keeps a chilly 68 degrees. By the time we watched Casablanca, I was freezing my tail off. Coming to my aid, she hands me a bright red, wooly Snuggie - and two more; one was for her, the other - for her dog.

If you haven't watched television or shopped the "As Seen on TV" section in the last year, you might be asking yourself, "What in God's name is a 'Snuggie'"? To get full details on the product, watch one of their full commercials, and then continue to read on; I'll wait.

OK. Now that you're caught up, let's begin to analyze the product. If you know this blog, you already know my opinion, but I believe it is only fair to list its (arguable) pros and cons from actual Snuggie consumers. I am sad to say that many of my friends own the wretched Snuggie. So, I decided to poll them and get their take on the product. Let's begin:

Snuggie Pros:

~ They come in many colors and designs.

~ They are for men, women and pets.

~ They keep you warm, while keeping you free to walk and use your hands.

~ It's made of fleece, but also machine washable.

Snuggie Cons:

~ They are "staticy".

~ You can't wear them outside, out of embarrassment.

~ Your friends make fun of you for buying one.

~ One size definitely doesn't fit all.

Now that we've been all fair and balanced, I think it's about time to bring on the scrutiny, because Snuggies are a joke.

I'll just ignore the fact that the lyrics to the Snuggie commercial are to the "Macarena," because that's just way too easy. However, has anyone noticed that a Snuggie is a backwards robe? This "blanket with sleeves" isn't a new invention; any person can make one themselves.

Step 1: take the tie off of a robe.
Step 2: put the robe on backwards.
Ta-da!

Also, has anyone who's bought a Snuggie said to themselves, "Wow! I look like a Jedi"? I don't know about you all, but I don't think I want to walk around looking like I am in some Star Wars, Obi-Wan Kenobi cult... and hey! Since when do dogs and cats need an extra source of warmth? They already have a fur coat. Contemplating buying a Snuggie for your pet is like saying, "Hmm... I think I might just throw $20 down the toilet".

Snuggies are a dumb idea, and have been deemed the BIG STINK of the day. Have you ever heard of a blanket? A robe? A hoodie? Hell, wear a muumuu; it's more stylish than the dreaded alternative! Do yourself a favor and don't fall for the bull. They're a waste of money.

~Syleste~